25 thoughts on “8 Inch Douche”

  1. He neglects to mention that the “Bimmer” is a 20 year old shitheap that he rescued from some “value” used car lot. And the money? He’ll have to pay it back one day.

    1. At least if it is twenty years old it was from back when they looked good. Ever since they let that Chris Bangle redesign all their models BMW’s are ugly ugly ugly.

  2. Went to Emory and can’t figure out that it is spelled ‘beamer’ as in beam… not ‘bimmer’ as in ‘could this guy be any dimmer?’

  3. Heh, Emory under full scholarship isn’t easy to get, particularly when you’re growing up in a trailer park in rural Alabama. And I happen to have 3 BMWs, only one of which is older and that’s because of being a very rare, fun roadster. A 335i twinturbo convertible still new enough to be under warranty isn’t exactly a hunk of junk. Paying back the money? Not when there’s no loan to pay back.

    By the way, do a cursory search online. BMW cars are called “bimmers” by enthusiasts and have been for quite some time. The motorcycles often get a different pronunciation.

    1. So being that you’re from rural Alabama, how many times did your Daddy have to cornhole you so that you could get permission to get your shitheap car?

  4. Oh, and I find it reasonable to mention that the original poster has messaged me a couple of times to tell me of my douchebaggery, while mentioning that he, at only 19, has a 2007 328i.

    While grindr has proven a great tool for procrastination and boredom, and I loved having an outrageous profile to get attention and have more people with whom to chat, this sort of thing gives me a, yes, “dimmer” view of it.

  5. You know what seems douchey to me about this one? The fact that he mentions that he has 8 inches, but he’s only here to chat out of boredom. So does this mean that we’re supposed to chat with him about his big dick?

  6. Heh, I don’t quite fit into the Emoroid mold. I saw plenty of them and lived off campus to avoid them because I couldn’t tolerate people who had everything given to them. And yeah, my BMWs are typically much more badass ones than anyone at Emory had. I had an E30, E36, two E34s, and four e39s, all with manual transmissions, in addition to my little M Roadster, and I’ve never paid more than $15k for one. I’ve done my own timing belt changes (e30), clutch jobs, and nearly everything else down to diagnosing K-Bus issues on an e39. I’m no typical guy from Emory who buys status symbols – I buy engineering that I can throw around a curve with confidence.

  7. well if you want 8incher and BMW driver then you should hook up with him. I dont think so. Why do you have to mention it. Are you that insecure that you have to mention how big you are?? geez douche!

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